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Why Why Why do I look at the internet?

June 11, 2011

I shouldn’t do it … I know it. Dumb silly stupid me.

Thought I’ll google CRL (crown rump length) and see just how much smaller The Spaniard is compared to other 7 week pregancies …

the answer is, at 5.7mm, small. The girl who was having IVF at the same time as me (everything the same day right the way through) had her scan the same day (obviously) and their little chap is 9.5mm that is nearly double my Spaniard … another friend who had IVF was 8.1mm on the equivalent day …

and so like a numpty what do I do … go on and look at research – which seems to say 100% of miscarriages involve smaller ‘than expected’ (I hate that phrase) CRL measurements… obviously not ALL smaller ‘than expected’ embryos end in miscarriage but there is a higher risk and the smallness might herald impending doom.

agggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

never again … why why why have I done this to myself … where is my optimism … is it the previous miscarriage or all that has gone on over the past few years that have turned me into worry girl?

I hope and pray our Spaniard makes it … it won’t be for lack of resting, preparation and eating and drinking the right stuff … come on little one … GROW please…

and be born, grow up and give me a slap for spending time filling my head with yet more worry by reading blah on the internet.

but in the meantime … JUST GROW >>> PLEASE

THANKYOU

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