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Not a natural born baker

January 5, 2013


it was with all the best intentions that I set out this morning to transform myself into a yummy mummy and to prepare for a rather important birthday … I sit here now with far more of my hair lopped off than I had planned, with sparkly red finger nails (one already slightly chipped) and slightly heady with the wafting aroma of vanilla sponge cake … and a bit of a burnt smell too …

I’m really not cut out for being perfect, it just doesn’t happen quite right … other people love having haircuts, they terrify me and I always feel weird afterwards today is no different, I swear I asked for only a few mm off and she said she wouldn’t get, “scissor happy” and, well, she did and I need about 2 years growing time to get back to where I was!! Anyway, I’m sure it will look just as chaotic as it normally does in the morning just a bit less of it … hey ho… the nails were a silly idea really and indulgence, now I look as if I’ve been in Auntie Clare’s dressing up box.

Most importantly the baking element of the day … I was determined to make a birthday cake myself … it’s what Mummys do … only being totally kitchenly-challenged it all (obviously went horribly wrong) … I didn’t have a sponge cake recipe so sourced one through twitter (thank you friends) and then instead of following it I gaily put the butter into the eggs before the sugar .. and ended up with something that the French might call ‘Isle Flotante’ but reminded me more of what you see in those horrible self improvement programmes where people get liposuction and they show you the bucket with all they’ve liposucked afterwards. Anyway, I kept on stirring and in the end when my wrist became too achy I poured / dolloped the mixture into mother’s very old and slightly rusty cake tin and following my now text message and twitter dm instructions put it in the oven at 160 degrees for 40 mins …

it all started going wrong at an early stage

it all started going wrong at an early stage

it smelt nice, lovely infact, but the knife came out sticky … 10 more mins … still sticky and the cake by now showing signs of being singed ontop with definite burning going on round the sides … another 10 mins and the knife came out clean.

Cake (still in tin) now wrapped in clingfilm and a tea towel waiting to be iced in the morning … ha … as if that’s only going to take a few minutes??!!! maybe a sprinkling of icing sugar … it doesn’t look the way they do in the recipe books .. I shall have to operate on it as well to remove the charred bits on the outside … but it was a labor of love

bit singed around the edges but made with love

bit singed around the edges but made with love

next year I will be more prepared.

Poor Hope having a culinary idiot as a mother … still it is made with love and good intentions (yes I know the road to M&S is paved with them) and right now that’ll have to be all that matters … it is a few years before she and her friends will know that I have inherited my own mother’s lack of domestic ability … but hopefully also that I have inherited her all round joyful amazingness and that cooking and dusting to perfection are for wimps … as is ironing!!

Right then … icing preparation.

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